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October 20, 2010

Heart longs for freedom

Freedom !! a magical word that brings a bundle of to the owner of it.for some reason I am feeling gloomy.It is at times like this that though it is extremely sunny outside,but it is gloomy,doom within.Same is with me today.I had a busy day today,though.I had to visit at a relatives place .There was a ritual for her parents death.there met many of the relatives and after returning home I again felt this pang in my heart .I remembered how I spent this part of the year last year.what a contrast between last year and this year!!!then life was carefree,yet disciplined,but on my own ,no question of answering objectionable questions,could do whatever my heart wished to do,leading a quality life,quality time.I was free!!!.now I am caged,struggling for my breath in the house under supervision of some scrutinising eyes.Now whatever I I do is being scrutinised,criticised,like given marks,even extremely trivial,unimportant things of daily life.My heart wants to break free,Oh God !!!I want to be free,think live freely.literally I have no space of my own.then ,I was really and truly happy,there was peace of mind.Hence ,I developed the interest for paper crafting,like card making,quilling and any other form of crafts.I discovered the urge of creativeness within me.but now somehow I am losing the desire,the energy bubbling within me last year to create something new and beautiful,delicate.God please listen to me,I don't want a lavish life but I want to live freely,think freely,live with dignity,not being insulted ,hurt and scrutinised rated at every step,every second.I want to lead a lively life not one that I would later repent for.